Post by Heather and Judy on Dec 27, 2008 20:58:34 GMT -5
On Christmas Day, my spouse and I lamented on our inability to get our RAD son to make a present for the other. He had been unable to complete any chores for days. He was also peeing/pooping on himself and destroying things in his room during the previous days. He opened gifts from us and other family members with no concern for the fact he had done nothing for either of us.
We sent a brief note to his therapist to vent. Her response put things in perspective. Basically she reminded us that Christmas is not about giving gifts in order to get some in return. It has to do with loving the unlovable.
Our children certainly do everything they can to be unlovable and to push us away. Who knows if it is because they do not wish to be loved or if they don't feel they deserve to be loved.
We love the unlovable even if they don't love us back in the way we expect or want. That's why we do it.
Enjoy,
Judy
We sent a brief note to his therapist to vent. Her response put things in perspective. Basically she reminded us that Christmas is not about giving gifts in order to get some in return. It has to do with loving the unlovable.
Our children certainly do everything they can to be unlovable and to push us away. Who knows if it is because they do not wish to be loved or if they don't feel they deserve to be loved.
We love the unlovable even if they don't love us back in the way we expect or want. That's why we do it.
Enjoy,
Judy